I have had a really hard time finding my voice in this world. There were moments, many of them along the way, where it was easier, safer, to retract and just observe, to watch human nature unravelling before me.
My silence made me very good at reading others.
But then I found my voice. It came and it scattered people to the four corners. No, I am not who you say I am. You don’t get to tell that story anymore. Not without it being interrupted. Challenged.
And there it was. I was shaken. But took up more space.
It freed me. And it’s been with me ever since.
Yesterday I went upstairs to my office to do a little bit of work. I sat down and took a deep breath and heard...scratch scratch scratch. As a psychic you’ve got to check that it’s not Spirit being a bit bloody naughty. Hmmm, no.
There it was again, scratch scratch scratch. It was coming from directly above me. And then the unmistakable sound of wings flapping. Frantically mind you.
We had a bird in our loft.
My husband went up to check and found a juvenile starling, very distressed and clearly lost.
Oh, he tried everything to get it out safely. It just kept fighting his best efforts to free it. So quite a while later and after being able to grab it but needing to let it go lest he hurt it, he emerged empty handed. We actually thought it had gone into the wall cavity.
So last night I didn’t sleep. And neither did my husband. I kept hearing it flutter a bit and then nothing. I had images of us ripping out a wall to get to it. I put down food and water to try and coax it out.
So very early this morning I hear the wings beating again. Really strong now. Then what sounded like it calling “mum”!!!
That was it. Loft hatch open. Room closed off. Windows wide open. Again.
C’mon baby. Take a risk. Fly towards the light. You’re going to have to get out of this comfort zone cause it’ll end up killing you. You don’t belong here. You were made to be free.
The bird swooped down and into the room. My husband and I were so excited. Almost there! Almost there!
It was momentarily stunned by its own reflection in the mirror and then stumbled towards the window sill, teetering on the brink.
Then it took flight, soaring up towards a large tree outside.
My husband and I looked at each other, misty eyed. For there is something infinitely beautiful in seeing something reclaim its freedom and it’s rightful place, especially after a period of struggle. Ourselves included.
Fear can trap us, facing it can free us.
Have yourself a beautiful week.
I would like to express my profound appreciation for the kind messages and words of encouragement that I’ve received over the last few months. They are like tonic for my soul. 🦋
( See previous blog post )
I’ve had financial, spiritual and emotional support come to me, often completely out of the blue, which has humbled me enormously. 💗
To my hot as hell husband, my lovely friends, my clients, my healers and my beautiful family. Thank you. 🙌
Quoting the inimitable John Wooden :
“You cannot live a perfect day without doing something for someone who will never be able to repay you. “ 🌟
And I don’t know if I’ll ever be able to. I’ll surely try. But for now, my days are all about receiving. 🤝
Focus on the good in life. For it is a gift.
Watch this space for my return date.❤️
Love to all,
May was pivotal, for me at least. I turned the big 45, we found a great home to move to in July...Billericay here we come! ...and I was diagnosed with Synovial Sarcoma, a rare type of cancer.
Whilst the first two were whooo hooo!, the last one felt like one of those moments in life where there’s a distinct before, line drawn, and then ...after.
Since then it’s been the mad dash in and out of London for daily radiotherapy and being meticulous about the conservation of my time and energy.
I’ve seen things that have left an indelible stamp upon my soul and met some truly remarkable people. I’ve unraveled the thoughts that I’m never to ask for help and instead placed myself in the hands of loved ones and strangers alike.
I’ve seen how incredibly blessed I am.
When I first found out, in my usual style I went into fight mode. I was gonna kick cancer’s ass. Hell, I’ve got work to do. But then I was talking to this lady who has travelled this path before and she said something which made me stop in my tracks. She said “ Deb, this is you. These are your cells. Even the cancer is still you. You’ve got to love it. “ And I’ve been kind and compassionate to every part of me since. This experience deserves respect and gentleness. I deserve it.
The one takeaway I have had from this part of my journey is how unbelievably powerful love is. I see parents with their children, partners with their loved ones, siblings and friends all being human barriers to this disease, like a wall of care placed around the heart, soul and body of the person undergoing treatment.
And that, in my humble opinion, is the only thing that matters in this world and quite literally the only thing we can take with us into the next.
To love and to be loved, whether by a partner, friend, a pet, or you loving yourself in your entirety. Whichever capacity works best for you.
All the other stuff is just filler. Don’t get lost in that stuff. That’s not where the juice is.
Life is what happens whilst we are busy making plans. Enjoy the small things.
Now let’s see where June takes me...
Hugs, Deb 💖✨🦋 xoxo
I left school at age 15 due to some pretty intense bullying. Although I had been placed in another school where I’d met a lovely girl to help me try overcome this, anxiety and panic attacks had bitten hard and I didn’t really shake them for many, many years after. They were so crippling that I developed agoraphobia which rendered me unable to go out in public. I’d always been a highly sensitive child but my sensitivity had really begun to turn on me. It was during this time that I got put into a program for early school leavers and kids who were really struggling. Being pretty much paint by numbers it was kind of depressing because no one really wanted to be there.
Then she arrived. Sure, it seemed like a normal day at first. But then I heard a click of heels coming down the corridor and in burst this lady, dressed head to toe in red and with a sleek blonde bob. I immediately sat up. She was unlike anyone, energetically speaking, I’d ever encountered. Holy guacamole and she also spoke with this amazing Dutch accent. Her name was Anyes.
This woman gave more of a damn about the kids sitting in the room than even they did for themselves. She spoke with optimism and passion. She was strict and commanded respect but was also compassionate and kind. She was so into what she was teaching. I had had many teachers in my lifetime but none were actually born to teach. This woman was.
She gave me hope. She reignited my dreams. Hell, she helped me see I even had them in the first place. She made me realise that I was more than where I’d come from, my socioeconomic background, my current place in my life. She lifted my vision and reminded me, even just through the way she dressed and spoke that there was a big wild world out there. And I could be a part of it. And I didn’t have to compromise my essence to do so.
I started to step out, quite literally, and tentatively joined the land of the living again. None of it was easy. 30 years on, the path I’ve chosen still isn’tand I stumbled many times - who hasn’t? - but its the only one for me. When I first stepped up on the runway with my modelling, my mother rejoiced like I’d just climbed Everest. Maybe I will one day. The climb, you see, had been that arduous. Feel the fear and do it anyway. This is coming from a person who very almost wasn’t here because of it. Fear I mean.
I wanted to share this to help you see that I am a living, breathing example of what someone being true to their passion can do. She ignited my world and changed my life forever. To heed your calling is one of your most gracious honours, no matter how noble or humble. So be brave, if you get knocked down 9 times, get up 10, find your courage, pursue your passion with dignity and set the damn room on fire. It’s now or never baby.
And by the way. Anyes was an Aries. We’ve all got it in us, somewhere. Go find it.
Anyes…from this world to where you are are in the next, thank you from the bottom of my soul. xxxx
New Moon in Aries
LON April 5 9:50am
SYD April 5 7:50pm
NY April 5 4:50am
Something pretty significant occurs in the skies on March the 6th 2019. Uranus, THE planet of change and enlightenment, moves into the decidedly change averse earth sign of Taurus. It's got a while to get cosy as its stay is for the next 7 years, although cosy may not be my first choice of word. B. I. G. to say the least.
So what to expect? In order to gauge the seismic shifts to come one may choose to look way back to when this unorthodox planet last graced this peace loving sign, around 85 years ago.
The main Taurus themes of wealth, resource distribution, our connection to the earth, food, farming, our relationship to the role of women and the feminine principle in society - Taurus is ruled by über feminine Venus - all underwent a revolution. The zeitgeist shifted from the need to assert national identity in a confronting and warlike manner, to putting real effort and strategy into creating something of lasting value which supported those ideals, whether for good or for ill. It was during this time that Hitler, a Taurus, announced that the Third Reich would last one thousand years. Women became an integral part of the war effort and rationing was tight. Agriculture was also hit hard with the Dust Bowl period in the US adding to the impact of the Great Depression.
So keep your eyes open for changes to environmental policies and the way in which we regard our food and farming. As a collective we may finally grasp the fact that no other species on earth actively destroys its own habitat and that if we stand a chance we must band together and tighten our belts and lifestyles to ensure the survival of the planet. Governments will be challenged to reflect the will of the people. Radical alternatives to the wasteful manner in which we distribute our food and resources as well as geoengineering will also make headlines.
Technology that supports sustainability and ecology moves into the mainstream. Uranus is very non gender specific and Venus is beauty therefore our notion of what is attractive in the beauty industries and the arts gets a makeover. Androgyny and a very non cisgender movement will embed into our culture. LGBTQ and women's rights supporters will achieve a louder voice.
The money centres of the world shift and new superpowers may emerge. Cryptocurrencies or cashless societies become viable options. Our views on land ownership and its impact on the animal and plant worlds all fall under the gaze of Uranus.
On the same day think master Mercury moves into retrograde and the New Moon in Pisces conjuncts visionary Neptune turning our thoughts within to see if our innermost lives correlate with what we see around us.
By December 2019 we will have a total of 4 powerful outer planets in the earth signs. The call of nature, ho ho, will be super strong. Yes, Uranus is the great change maker, but we can be strong and grounded amidst the chaos. When we are in tune with our own patterns and cycles, our bodies well rested and nourished, we can then embrace the higher purpose of this pivotal time. To set our sights on the future and the generations yet to come, to be part of the solution at an individual level and to leave your corner of the world a better place than how you found it. For you see my friends, the most flexible and resourceful shall, indeed, inherit the earth.
Pic courtesy of Unsplash
There is plenty on the move during the month of February with no less than 4 planets changing signs and one celestial body poised, as if waiting to take flight, in the final degree of Aries, wrapping up 8 long years of radical personal transformation.
Change is afoot my dears, so it's best to wrap your heads around this early on in the month so you can completely embrace the opportunities presented over the coming weeks. Either way you look at it, you can’t hold back the tide so suit up, grab your board and ride that wave!
Venus is in the hot seat this week so expect her themes of self worth, loveability, finances and all things gorgeous to be on everyones lips. I know Valentine's Day is next week but for once Venus is early to the party. Reconsidering long held views on security and if this yearning gets in the way of personal growth is written all over the 1st of February. The old ways of loving, whether ourselves or others, fall away in favour of freedom and independence on the 2nd of the month. Remember this can still be done within the context of a relationship, bringing light and trust. This transit, being in the final degree of Aries can make us rather myopic in terms of our plans. Try to look outward and forward. There is another very powerful transit at play on the same day intensifying our desires and bringing forth the need to control, so steady as she goes m'darlings.
On the 3rd of February, even though ideas are in free flow bringing a surge of optimism and expansive thinking, emotions are running just as high. Teacher Chiron brings to the surface old wounds, especially around femininity, values and the need to be accepted, in order to be healed and released. Other folk will be touchy as all get out as well so give them space if needed. And don’t be a mean girl/guy if you can help it. Our lady of Lurve moves into ambitious and practical Capricorn today until March the 1st giving us a discerning eye and energy to hustle for long term goals.
The Aquarius New Moon on February the 4th has a wealth of potential if we can just get out of our own way and not overthink the possibilities. With gorgeous aspects all pointing towards lucky Jupiter, life takes on greater meaning, it's reach stretching farther. You little ripper. On top of that the Moon sits bang between grounded Saturn and soulful Neptune, both in rulership, aka kings of their freakin castles. This aspect is part of the signature of 2019 so whatever new ventures are borne from the abundant creativity now carry us throughout the course of the year. Booyah!
Mercury and Mars take centerstage so expect the niceties - and not so much - of the last few days to evaporate. It’s time for planning and for action although we may be set slightly adrift mid week.
The 8th of February is busyyyy! Our confidence spikes and doors open. Or is the other way around? Conversations prove productive although we may need to think our way around an obstacle connected to our heart felt desires. Men can be of aid or assistance as can anything linked with education or training. Brilliant. On the 9th that aforementioned obstacle reappears. It could just be that someone wants to see you stay put instead of moving forward. A case of sour grapes. It may also be you standing in your own path. Think outside the box. Live a little. Be innovative.
Chatty Mercury moves into decidedly unchatty Pisces on the 10th of the month until April the 17th. Why the long stay you say? Next month’s upcoming Mercury retrograde. You’re welcome.
Our sign of communication gets submerged for a while. Our powers of observation gets sharpened as does our intuition. Retreat of all kind is marked, whether that’s a yoga class, meditation, reading a moving novel, becoming avoidant or wanting to rub out our edges. Be careful with the last two for wherever you go, there you are.
Speaking of avoiding, think twice before you leap into action on the 13th of the month. Events move at warp speed and so can our mouths. Thumbs down to recklessness and impetuosity and a big thumbs up to brilliant, but highly doable, dreams being birthed. Unburdening yourself from someone else’s burden is also a win. Just be sure you’re not being irresponsible. Single’s could meet someone who breaks the mould completely. Oh my.
Valentine’s Day see’s sexy Mars move into super sensual Taurus until March the 31st. Now, the God of War is slightly out of kilter here as Taurus is ruled by the Goddess of Love but this is a perfect combo for immense focus and determination toward something - or someone! - you’re passionate about. Cue Marvin Gaye.
Full Moon week Luna chicas or chicos. But before that we have the Sun, Chiron and Venus to contend with along with a sprinkle of Mercury. Sparkly!
The 15th of February tangles with the North Node ( again! ) making us wonder if we are heading in the right direction with our lives. This can be a classic crisis of confidence or of course it can go right the other way and become rigidity and an unwillingness to listen to reason. Soooo….don’t be a jerk and don’t let anyone be a jerk with you.
The 17th of the month is gorgeous and squishy and soft. Beautiful for creativity, rest and cake. If cake is your thing. It’s definitely mine.
There's this kind of mash ball of inspiration, beauty, dedication, long lasting connections and the need to rise above the mundane on the 18th, 19th and the 20th of the month. It’s a real push/pull energy due to some very different planets making their presence felt. Yes, there are reality checks, especially with love or money. Yes, there is grounding on offer and a wonderful chance to build something of lasting value in our private and public spheres. But there is also the temptation to shun the opportunities given and swim away from commitment quicker than you can say
" hasta la vista." Baby. Selflessness and noble causes are the higher frequencies of this transit. The lower? Fudging the truth and promising what you cannot deliver. You could find yourself slapped silly by the mighty hand of justice if you do, so don’t even go there.
Chiron, the asteroid representing wounds and insecurities, where we feel exposed, but ultimately where our greatest healing comes from and also where we can teach others, shifts into the sign of Aries until 2027. This is a big deal astrologically and one where we can see the collective conscience play out. In Aries we are encouraged to speak up and out, for ourselves and for others. Old wounds regarding our individuality, our ability to be assertive and swallowing our rage can be brought to light in order to heal for once and for all. Responding to challenging situations with anger or feeling the need to completely annihilate your opponent ,or the opposite of totally withdrawing can now be dealt with and resolved. Healthy boundaries and self esteem are the result. Courage my friends. Courage.
The glorious Sun moves into dreamy Pisces on the 19th of February until March the 20th. It immediately illuminates the Full Moon in Virgo. This Moon also speaks of courage, due to its link with fixed star Regulus. Regulus bestows success upon projects as well as luck and pure swagger. Keep the ego in check lest the success be short lived or you end up looking like a goose and you’re onto a winner. This Moon forms a sexy and amazing connection to Mars and Uranus giving daring and a sense of adventure. So much energy here! The ruler of the Moon, Mercury, is sharing space with Neptune, God of all things charitable and intuitive. Rose coloured glasses? A tad. Or a lot. But Virgo is also a very practical sign and bolstered by serious Saturn and loving Venus, keeping your feet on the ground even if your head is in the clouds.
Once again va va Venus and her witty consort Mercury have the floor for the week. This is a super sociable duo although Pluto will bring depth and intensity to the occasion. There is no middle ground when Pluto makes an appearance and a white hot line in the sand is drawn where boundaries were blurred over the last few days. Are you in or are you out?
Dreams are grand on the 22nd of February and you may want to bite off more than you can chew then chew like hell re anything to do with conversations, the internet, learning, education, travel and philosophy. The world truly feels like our oyster today. Watch for burnout or info overload. Oh yeah... and gossip.
Passions are most definitely stirred on the 23rd of the month as is the power of love. Or is that the love of power? It may be hard to tell today. Unexpected support from people who hold sway can bolster self esteem and add weight to our dreams. Sensuality, empowerment ( how many times can I mention power??) and super important meetings are key themes now.
For the last time this month, on the 26th, the North Node whispers your name upon the wind, calling you toward your destiny with outstretched hands. Is it the siren call? Or a vision that can actually be achieved? With careful planning and enough forethought, who knows what can be accomplished? On the 28th of February you are encouraged to take that initial step forward into the great unknown. Deep breaths…now go forth and conquer. See you next month. xoxo
"You cannot discover new oceans unless you have the courage to lose sight of the shore" - Andre Gide
January 28 to 31
How have you fared this eclipse season? Has change swept into your life and cleared out the clutter? Or did the winds of change almost sweep you away? Maybe all, maybe none, maybe a bit of both. One thing for sure is we were given many an opportunity to be aware of where and with whom to place our energies and where to step back and conserve our vital force.
Due to this I’m returning to monthly updates as opposed to my dalliances into weekly sky weather reports. Juggling two toddlers, clients and home renovations means my lifestyle doesn’t allow it at the moment and sometimes you’ve just gotta choose you, sanity and family. Or one would hope!
Soooo, here's the themes for the final days of January 2019. Curiouser and curiouser.
The skies a relatively chilled for the next few days, after the hullabaloo of the last few weeks. On the 30th of January however , clever Mercury catches up to our radiant Sun in the sign of Aquarius bringing with it a plethora of lightbulb moments. This is the big AHA!
An idea has its time and takes hold, especially as this duo is 1. in an air ( = thinking ) sign, 2. in a fixed - read determined/ stubborn - modality and 3. Aquarius is all over questioning the done way. If you’ve been in a sticky “ what to do ?” type situation this day delivers an exit strategy in a grand way.
The final day, on the 31st of January, brings a luscious meeting between überdisciplined Saturn and visionary Neptune. It is the first of three meetings this year between these two planets, in their home signs respectively. When a planet is in rulership as these two are, they are super comfortable and functioning at full capacity. One of the key themes of 2019 is making your dreams come true. By this I mean fully actualising them, not just sitting around staring at the clouds daydreaming. It is imperative to be very, very practical about your hopes and aspirations this year and do your homework enough to satisfy great Saturn’s need for dedication, integrity and accountability. Without this to anchor our vision, the dream falters and crumbles. Poof! Into thin air. Remember this today as well as June 18th and November the 8th. We have wonderful opportunities in 2019, it’s just about seeing the forest for the trees.
As Kate Ceberano sang, “ And I won’t ever walk away. I’ll just be brave and stay. Hold me til the end and in your arms I’ll rise up high.” My wish to you is bravery of heart, clarity of intention and to be surrounded with those who uplift and inspire you.
See you in Feb my loves. xoxo
Pic via @kpunkka - instagram
Some weeks glide in effortlessly, others fly under the radar. This week bolts from the stalls in spectacular fashion due to Monday’s Full Moon Lunar Eclipse or Wolf Moon to be exact. Why the Wolf? Because in the Northern Hemisphere this was the time that wolves would howl from hunger in and around the villages of India. The lack of food was from the cold. So theres something primal about this lunation. Something pack like and instinctual. The sign that the Eclipse falls in is Leo, sitting at a very potent 0 degrees. Issues around loyalty will roar as will protecting what is ours. Lunar eclipses essentially black out the light of our lady Luna, High Priestess of all things emotion, family, home and nurturing. They reset our emotional responses but sometimes not without upsetting our norm first.
Coupled with this energy are links from the Moon and Mercury to Uranus, the zodiac’s wildcard. There is much pent up emotion just itching to come out resulting in fatigue and lack of concentration. People and things behave in decidedly, ermmmm, unique ways. Uranus values freedom and originality. On the flip side there's knee jerk reactions, lack of commitment and rebelliousness. So you see here that this Moon has quite the signature. Don’t go throwing your whole life away based on a whim, if you can’t keep calm and carry anything then find a nice quiet place to lose your crap and do look at unusual solutions to existing problems. This Moon also links beautifully to Ceres, goddess of nutrition, Providence and fertility. Lovely. There is bounty to be had by not getting swept away in the chaos.
Venus is meeting up with the mysterious Neptune,blurring lines and creating romantic illusions. Still, brilliant for the creativity. Mars trips over Saturn and obstacles result but patience can be borne from a tactical approach. All of this on the 21st of January. Heck.
On the 22nd of the month Venus is right back in the spotlight with glorious Jupiter. This aspect won’t happen again until November so grab hold of the potential that manifests when these two benefics unite. Finances, happiness and relationships all reap the rewards from this combo. Ahhh…optimism. Such a feel good transit as long as we don’t go completely over the top and crack onto the boss or something. Mercury meets with the nodes that day so something will shift in the way in which we communicate and present our thoughts.
Speaking of...Uranus short circuits Mercury on the 23rd of January which I’ve discussed a bit above. Today it is exact. Machinery and cars can go haywire although we can hatch some brilliant plans. Just make sure you follow through. It's a tad temperamental this one.
On the 24th of the month, Mercury, once again, is on the move. This time into the sign of easy breezy Aquarius until February the 10th. These two aligned are stubborn, utterly strategic and cooly detached. Seek out those who support your ethos and with whom you can be utterly yourself. Just be you. Everyone else is taken.
On the 25th of January macho Mars joins forces with bountiful Jupiter so if you want to throw your all into a project, now is the time. Not only is this awesome for physical prowess, especially in the fire signs of Aries and Sagittarius respectively, but its perfect for knocking holes through the walls presented early this week. Great for confidence, productivity and creativity.
Go get em tigers. Have a brilliant week. xoxo
There is an ebb and a flow to all things and thats something to take into account over the next 7 days. We cannot have one without the other. Too much activity breeds nervous tension. The details get overlooked. Ennui is borne from not having enough.
Sooo, anyone up for a gentle walk outdoors, lovely yoga class or watching a beautiful film? Ummmm, me. Always! Well, we may just get the opportunity very early in the week, when luscious Neptune, ruler of heightened perception and spirituality aligns with communication planet Mercury. This aspect is great for unpacking the heaviness of last week and just being. Our psychic antennae is finely tuned as is our sensitivity. Gorgeous for meditation, creativity, connecting soulfully. Ahhh and music. Mind the details though if needing full blown facts and practicality. Use this time to recharge your batteries because the week seems to get more intense as it goes on. Pencil in the 14th of January for that afternoon stroll.
Whoa mamma, can you feel it in the air? Feel what you ask? A sense of energy building. And what energy it is! Firstly, on the 18th of the month, sensual Venus forms a truly harmonious link to passionate Mars. Oh, so lovely! Venus doesn’t feel overpowered by Mars but is complimented. Supported. Friendships, harmonious romantic associations and joyous social occasions are highlighted. A great time to not only show someone you love them but like them to boot. Keep it light.
This may be a tad tricky because on the same day Mercury joins forces with watchful Pluto. By nature these two planets, upon meeting, push things deep. I mean really deep. Fantastic for nutting out what makes you and others tick, honest evaluations of ourselves and our lives and anything that requires immense concentration and focus. Not so good for forcing your agenda or coming on too strong. Just because you want to go there doesn’t necessarily mean someone else is comfortable to do so. Be sensitive and kind. This combo can sting if it's misbehaving.
Alright here we go. Expect the unexpected on the 19th of January. It's as simple as that. The tradition bound Capricorn Sun squares off to future oriented Uranus in the final degrees of Aries. Fireworks or clashes of wills result. Of course it doesn’t have to play out this way but both signs don’t like to back down and both planets are very much do as they please. Approach today with a sense of open mindedness and a willingness to listen. Machinery or vehicles could throw major tantrums today as could our egos and nervous systems. If the old way won’t cut the mustard consider an innovative solution instead.
Speaking of, Aquarius, the sign that is ruled both by conservative Saturn and out there Uranus, begins its time in the Sun on the 20th of the month until February the 18th. This gives us a reprieve of sorts from all the testing of our foundations from the last month to seeing how we wish to build upon those blocks. It is the time to reach outward to friendship groups and people who can inspire us, potentially by tipping the status quo on its head. If something’s gotta go it’s gotta go. Keep that in mind for the upcoming Lunar Eclipse next week. Wink wink.
Be super good to you! Catch you on the flip side. xoxo
I'm a 4th generation Psychic, Astrologer and Tarot reader with over 20 years professional experience. This is my quirky, down-to-earth and honest portrayal of the day to day life of a reader, various channeled messages and astro lore. Enjoy! Ask questions, have fun, explore. Thanks for visiting!